Friday, November 30, 2012

Forgiveness

"Consider it pure joy, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your
faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete,
not lacking anything."
James 1:2-4

God has faced me with a new challenge – the challenge of officially forgiving someone that has really hurt me. When I say “hurt” I am referring to an ultimate betrayal. I am feeling very much lead by God to face her head on and truly verbalize my forgiveness. It is not going to be an easy conversation to have. I imagine it will be very emotional for me, but I am willing to do it anyway. God has been challenging me in many ways lately, and honestly, I see it as a huge blessing. He’s clearly not done with me. My perseverance continues and I look forward to where He is taking me.

I see this as a huge opportunity to grow and let go of some pain from my marriage/divorce. This will free me of the heartache and worry. She doesn’t deserve to have that power of me, so I’m letting it go!

I decided to share this because I want God to use me to help others. I have been through so much, and I hope that others will continue to benefit from my trials. I have already been blessed to know that my experiences with the Green Beans and surrendering my desire to have a child to God have helped many of you. Knowing that makes it all worth it.

Will you share with me your forgiveness stories or your need to forgive someone?! I am sure we can all learn something from each other. It’s a huge challenge that is easy just to turn away from and ignore. It’s nothing that we ever have to do, but should do. How have you benefited as a result from forgiving someone?

I am no expert, but what I am finding is if you ever find yourself saying “Why me??”, it’s probably God trying to do something in your life. Be open to God’s favor. He will do things far more amazing than you could ever imagine. Trust me!  I just know that God has big plans for Taylor and I. I cannot wait for them, and I can already see these wonderful plans unfolding. I’ve never been able to face life with no fear, but now I can! What a wonderful freeing feeling God has given me!

SIGNATURE_010312 (2)

19 comments:

  1. Best of luck to you in forgiving this horrible human being.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you for your post. I have never commented on anyone's blog before but I have been reading your blog since you were pregnant with the green beans. This post compelled me to write and commend you on your power of forgiveness on your friends betrayal. Although I haven't gone through what you have, I have had a lot of betrayals from family members. I have learned that I have to forgive them and move on. I felt that by not forgiving them I was becoming a very bitter and unhappy person, which wasn't a very good role model for my children. Thanks for writing this post!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Last year our church did a multi-part series on Forgiveness. Pastor Craig compared the pain of resentment to a poison in your own body (in that it hurts you more than it hurts the person you resent). It was an excellent series if you ever have time to listen to them (they're also podcasts on iTunes).

    http://gfconline.com/series/freedom-series/

    ReplyDelete
  4. Actually your "friend" and ex hubby should be the ones apologizing to YOU and asking for YOUR forgiveness! Seriously!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I am so sorry to hear this Lauren! I hope it brings you the closure and peace you need! Praying for you!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. You are truly a beautiful and inspiring yound lady. I hope my daughters are able to face painful times with grace and diginity as you have. Forgiveness is difficult on any level, but knowing it's a gift you are actully giving yourself, is a true testament on the strength of your faith. I wish you much happiness on your journey....

    ReplyDelete
  7. I have read your blog off and on since you were pregnant with your green beans. I rarely comment b/c my work typically blocks the commenting widgits on blogs. Anyways, this post has me in tears. You are strong and faithful woman - I will be praying for you as you take on this task. I would love to chat via email, do you have it posted somewhere? I think mine is on my profile, if you want to shoot me yours.

    jessica

    ReplyDelete
  8. I have had the opportunity to forgive as your have forgiven, family members and friends...in forgiveness one finds freedom and peace and I am glad for you that you are seeking that for yourself. It is not always easy...but God always comes through with peace.

    Good for you for forgiving those who have hurt you...the blessings in the long run will be your. ♥

    ReplyDelete
  9. As I sit and read this post, I can't imagine what you are going through. I just recently lost my ex of 10 years to my best friend. We had children 3 days apart and they have done everything together. It's been a rocky ride, but I too have found strength in getting back to church and from having wonderful supportive friends! I hope you can find the strength to forgive and then share it with us. I am still struggling with it, but not as much as I was. Any advice is greatly appreciated!!

    ReplyDelete
  10. You are truly an example of what happens by the power of God, because only through Him could you possibly forgive such heart wrenching betrayal. You have handled all of this with such grace...it's astonishing. You have peace and joy that just doesn't make sense under the circumstances...which is a beautiful testament to what God will bring when we trust Him. I thank you for your openness, you have been such a powerful witness to me.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Hope that this releases you in ways that you are just now able to be released. I truly believe that forgiving while hard is one of the truest ways to grow in your relationship with the Lord.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Lauren, I have been reading your blog since you have been pregnant with Taylor (our girls are only two months apart). Your strength is astounding and your light shines brightly. Thank you for sharing this post. I am going through a difficult time at the moment and I really needed to see this today. It's nice to be reminded that we are all connected, even when we feel like we're alone. Thank you for being open so that those who need to hear your words can also be affected by the growth you are experiencing.

    ReplyDelete
  13. I hope your "friend" & ex are blessed with the curse of a million fleas permanently inhabiting their armpit hair.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Forgiveness is when you stop wishing she would hurt the way you hurt, it will happen but its a process, eventually you will be free of the resentment. You deserve better, you deserve to be completely happy. There is no better revenge than being eve more fabulous. Live fabulously, love wholly and let God judge in the end. There are great things in store for you, keep your head up! Remember that the sins of the flesh will be paid for on earth.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Lauren, I'm getting better at forgiving your ultimate betrayer because of YOU! You are so strong & you handle your emotions in such a constructive, mature way! Seeing you handle this situation so graciously has taught me a thing or two. I'm learning to pray for those that I would normally feel negativity towards. Hang in there, I'm always here for you! Love you!

    ReplyDelete
  16. I, too, have been betrayed in a similar situation and it hurts and cuts painfully deep. I was never religious but suddenly felt touched by god and healed recently (the betrayal is over a year old) and found myself forgiving. Remember that forgiveness is not the same as approval and for some reason I always linked those two things together! I feel much better now and peaceful and connected to god! Thank you for your honesty and your post!

    ReplyDelete
  17. It took me a long time as in many years to forgive my ex and it did not have anything to do with an affair. I can say this, once you let it go you will feel better. Being mad only eats and eats at you. I still have ill feelings towards him and I doubt I would ever be friends with him, but the constant thinking about it has left

    ReplyDelete
  18. Lauren, I had to forgive my ex. I was simply tired of being angry and hurt. It took too much energy out of my life and I was unable to focus on anything else. I admire your strength and your faith. Praying for you and Taylor.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Every once in a while I check in, and today when I saw the post of YOUR new home, I started to dig back into the archives, then I found "divorce" in your tags, and my heart sank. I have followed since you were pregnant with the quads. After seeing just how far God has brought you, it's clear everything was for the purpose of preparing you for this season of your life. What I can't understand is what could compel your husband to consider another woman above you. I think you are beautiful, motivated, intelligent, responsible and a very compassionate person & mother. I can honestly say that he has lost something beautiful and amazing by not honoring you in the way God expects and that you deserve. Wishing you a beautiful life with the man God has already chosen for you and that your family will continue to blossom! You are fortunate to be surrounded by a loving family and an ever present God. You will be fine. :)

    ReplyDelete